IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS


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Learn how to stop accepting the crumbs of empty relating and start creating more secure, meaningful, emotional connections today. Our supportive community offers a Self-Directed Healing approach for skill-building and focuses on healing attachment injuries. The community is three years old and going strong with many long-time members.

What is Improve Your Relationships?

​We are a learning community based on an 8-week program of self-directed healing. We explore how to change old relationship patterns that get in the way of creating quality, secure connections with others. Together, we set weekly goals for better relating, offer advice and feedback, and document what we learn. Our unique community delivers substance, kindness, and encouragement.

 

We believe relationships are the foundation of our well-being and that emotional connections matter. We value creating securely attached relationships and addressing unhealed attachment trauma. The good news is that we can rewire our brain's attachment blueprint. The good news is that we can create healthy relationships that last and thrive. Do you want to improve your relationships?

IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS


DAYS
0
0
HOURS
0
0
MINUTES
0
0
SECONDS
0
0

Learn how to stop accepting the crumbs of empty relating and start creating more secure, meaningful, emotional connections today. Our supportive community offers a Self-Directed Healing approach for skill-building and focuses on healing attachment injuries. The community is three years old and going strong with many long-time members.

What is Improve Your Relationships?

​We are a learning community based on an 8-week program of self-directed healing. We explore how to change old relationship patterns that get in the way of creating quality, secure connections with others. Together, we set weekly goals for better relating, offer advice and feedback, and document what we learn. Our unique community delivers substance, kindness, and encouragement.

 

We believe relationships are the foundation of our well-being and that emotional connections matter. We value creating securely attached relationships and addressing unhealed attachment trauma. The good news is that we can rewire our brain's attachment blueprint. The good news is that we can create healthy relationships that last and thrive. Are you ready to improve your relationships?

Get clear on what you want so that your relationships thrive.

What Do You Want?

  • Feel Secure / Do you want to achieve greater ease when relating with loved ones?

  • Trust Intimacy / Do you want to experience stronger, yet simpler, emotional connections?

  • Make Choices / Do you want to discover new responses for old relationship challenges?

  • Value Yourself / Do you want to confidently identify and voice your emotional needs?

  • Stay in Integrity / Do you want to walk towards and invest in people who are right for you?

  • Come to Belong / Do you want to feel the warmth of coming home to your own heart?

What Do You Want?

  • Feel Secure / Do you want to achieve greater ease when relating with loved ones?

  • Trust Intimacy / Do you want to experience stronger, yet simpler, emotional connections?

  • Make Choices / Do you want to discover new responses for old relationship challenges?

  • Value Yourself / Do you want to confidently identify and voice your emotional needs?

  • Stay in Integrity / Do you want to walk towards and invest in people who are right for you?

  • Come to Belong / Do you want to feel the warmth of coming home to your own heart?

What are members learning?

"I learned to sit with and observe my feelings."

"I have learned so many things from Alan's videos and being in the Improve Your Relationships Community. I have learned about attachment trauma and how it has affected my relationship with myself and others. I have also learned strategies to keep the focus on myself and regulate my thoughts and feelings. I used to be so controlled by outside forces and get really dysregulated. Now I've learned to sit with and observe my feelings. I don't judge them or base who I am on them. I use them as a guide for action!

The Community is so welcoming and supportive. We are all speaking a common language that's positive and uplifting. 
The Weekly Discussion Topics that we discuss are relevant to our recovery. And it's a safe place to share and not get the dysfunctional feedback we have gotten from the people in our past. I recommend the Community for sure."

Steven

"I learned I control the pace of understanding myself."

"In the Community, I've learned that I am a student and teacher of life and myself. I've learned how special it is to empower my own learning, and the learning of others. I know it's okay to desire meaningful connection. It is courageous to reflect. I've learned that I control the pace of understanding myself and working with others. One of the unique things about the Community is how self-driven and inquisitive it is.

 

The community gives me new language and lenses to function within, and interpret my relationships. Membership evolves and so does my relationship with the Community's Weekly Discussion Topics. Alan does a great job of encouraging us to embrace the full range of living and healing—this includes celebrating joy and accomplishments, naming goals, reflecting on gratitude, turning to research and many activities involving the mind and body. We find what works for us."

Ashley

"I learned how to rely on myself and consider options"

"I highly recommend the Community. I've been a member now for about 2.5 years. I have learned and grown so much. It isn't just learning online. This stuff ripples out into real life. It's such a joy to be healing alongside others who are striving for the same things.

 

I learned how to rely on myself. I came from a background where I relied heavily on codependency. I would not budge without first receiving instructions to move. Today, I am able to lead with my own decisions. I now consider my options and choose what is best for me.

What I love about the community is how much I feel seen. I feel like I’m among family. Each day, I check-in with where I’m at and then people respond. 
Members remember me and care about me. It’s no longer the one-sided relating that I’m used to where I’m doing all the chasing. I’m experiencing two-sided relating instead."

Kate

What are members learning?

"I learned to sit with and observe my feelings."

"I have learned so many things from Alan's videos and being in the Improve Your Relationships Community. I have learned about attachment trauma and how it has affected my relationship with myself and others. I have also learned strategies to keep the focus on myself and regulate my thoughts and feelings. I used to be so controlled by outside forces and get really dysregulated. Now I've learned to sit with and observe my feelings. I don't judge them or base who I am on them. I use them as a guide for action!

The Community is so welcoming and supportive. We are all speaking a common language that's positive and uplifting. 
The Weekly Discussion Topics that we discuss are relevant to our recovery. And it's a safe place to share and not get the dysfunctional feedback we have gotten from the people in our past. I recommend the Community for sure."

Steven

"I learned I control the pace of understanding myself."

"In the Community, I've learned that I am a student and teacher of life and myself. I've learned how special it is to empower my own learning, and the learning of others. I know it's okay to desire meaningful connection. It is courageous to reflect. I've learned that I control the pace of understanding myself and working with others. One of the unique things about the Community is how self-driven and inquisitive it is.

 

The community gives me new language and lenses to function within, and interpret my relationships. Membership evolves and so does my relationship with the Community's Weekly Discussion Topics. Alan does a great job of encouraging us to embrace the full range of living and healing—this includes celebrating joy and accomplishments, naming goals, reflecting on gratitude, turning to research and many activities involving the mind and body. We find what works for us."

Ashley

"I learned how to rely on myself and consider options"

"I highly recommend the Community. I've been a member now for about 2.5 years. I have learned and grown so much. It isn't just learning online. This stuff ripples out into real life. It's such a joy to be healing alongside others who are striving for the same things.

 

I learned how to rely on myself. I came from a background where I relied heavily on codependency. I would not budge without first receiving instructions to move. Today, I am able to lead with my own decisions. I now consider my options and choose what is best for me.

What I love about the community is how much I feel seen. I feel like I’m among family. Each day, I check-in with where I’m at and then people respond. 
Members remember me and care about me. It’s no longer the one-sided relating that I’m used to where I’m doing all the chasing. I’m experiencing two-sided relating instead."

Kate

What are members learning?

"I've learned to sit with and observe my feelings."

"I have learned so many things from Alan's videos and being in the Improve Your Relationships Community. I have learned about attachment trauma and how it has affected my relationship with myself and others. I have also learned strategies to keep the focus on myself and regulate my thoughts and feelings.

 

I used to be so controlled by outside forces and get really dysregulated. Now I've learned to sit with and observe my feelings. I don't judge them or base who I am on them. I use them as a guide for action!

The Community is so welcoming and supportive. We are all speaking a common language that's positive and uplifting.

 

The Weekly Discussion Topics that we discuss are relevant to our recovery. And it's a safe place to share and not get the dysfunctional feedback we have gotten from the people in our past. I recommend the Community for sure."

Steven

"I've learned that I control the pace of understanding myself."

"In the Community, I've learned that I am a student and teacher of life and myself. I've learned how special it is to empower my own learning, and the learning of others. I know it's okay to desire meaningful connection. It is courageous to reflect. I've learned that I control the pace of understanding myself and working with others. One of the unique things about the Community is how self-driven and inquisitive it is.

 

The community gives me new language and lenses to function within, and interpret my relationships. Membership evolves and so does my relationship with the Community's Weekly Discussion Topics.

 

Alan does a great job of encouraging us to embrace the full range of living and healing—this includes celebrating joy and accomplishments, naming goals, reflecting on gratitude, turning to research and many activities involving the mind and body. We find what works for us."

Ashley

"I learned how to rely on myself and consider options."

"I highly recommend the Community. I've been a member now for about 2.5 years. I have learned and grown so much. It isn't just learning online. This stuff ripples out into real life. It's such a joy to be healing alongside others who are striving for the same things.

 

I learned how to rely on myself. I came from a background where I relied heavily on codependency. I would not budge without first receiving instructions to move. Today, I am able to lead with my own decisions. I now consider my options and choose what is best for me.

What I love about the community is how much I feel seen. I feel like I’m among family. Each day, I check-in with where I’m at and then people respond.

 

Members remember me and care about me. It’s no longer the one-sided relating that I’m used to where I’m doing all the chasing. I’m experiencing two-sided relating instead."

Kate

Weekly Discussion Topics

WEEK 1

Partner Relationships

We explore how our core beliefs about romance trigger attachment trauma. Healthy, secure relating is grounded in realism, not fantasy. This week, we decode relating.

WEEK 2

Grieving Losses

When healing attachment wounds, we grieve what happened and also what didn’t happen. Grieving skills are the foundation for self-directed healing. This week, we name our losses.

WEEK 3

Family Relationships

We inherit our relationship template from parents, caregivers, and family. How we were treated creates the blueprint for how we love today. This week, we reach out to our inner child.

WEEK 4

Self-Healing Goals

Self-directed healing means we’re in the driver seat of our life’s maturing. It’s about proactively learning how to trust our inner wisdom. This week, we go deeper and plan for a better future. 

WEEK 5

Emotional Health

When we're emotionally ignored, we learn to deny our feelings. Emotional honesty is the healing path. This week, we welcome all feelings -- shame, anger, longing, joy, etc.

WEEK 6

Befriend Yourself

Many of us are hard on ourselves. Instead of shaming, let's practice self-love instead. This week, we focus on compassion, reliable self-kindness, and encouraging ourselves.

WEEK 7

Attachment

We define secure and insecure attachment and their impact. This week, we name the skills needed for better relating. We work on our core desires and relationship manifesto.

WEEK 8

Healing Gratitude

Gratitude cultivates an attitude of possibility and workability. Life's challenges become less permanent. This week, we review our healing work and name appreciations.

Make an investment in your self-directed healing work.

Why This Course is Good for you?

Why This Course is Good for you?

Membership Benefits

  • Engagement / Weekly Conversation Topics

  • Resources / Worksheets & Videos

  • Support / Member-Led Advice & Feedback

  • Homework/ Learning Activities & Project Rewire

  • Structure / Goals-Setting & Self-Accountability

  • Community / Group Learning & Encouragement

Membership Benefits

  • Engagement / Weekly Conversation Topics

  • Resources / Worksheets & Videos

  • Support / Member-Led Advice & Feedback

  • Homework/ Learning Activities & Project Rewire

  • Structure / Goals-Setting & Self-Accountability

  • Community / Group Learning & Encouragement

CONNECTION

The power of community connection helps us normalize relationship struggles. It inspires us to take action for change. We learn from each other. Let's engage our self-directed healing work together.

DIRECTION

The community offers a structured, reoccurring 8-week program alongside 24/7 community support from like-minded learners. Let's make a plan and dialogue about what we learn.

BELONGING

Our members are kind, supportive, and friendly. We nurture a welcoming online experience. We frequently understand each other's challenges, which means you're not alone. We're in this together.

What are members saying?

"I am more compassionate towards myself."

"I have learned about attachment trauma and codependency in ways that have been so profound to my life.

 

It has released a lot of shame and I have a much more compassionate relationship with myself.

 

I love being in Community with other members; they all bring so much insight and wisdom from their journey as well as empathy and compassion."

Ashley

"It's truly a personalized healing program."

"The Community is a safe space to explore and learn about attachment trauma and attachment styles.

 

The Self-Directed framework allowed me to create a truly personalized program at my own pace and on my own schedule.

 

In addition to Alan’s guidance and instruction, there is a community of insightful, inspiring, and kind people to help me focus, heal and grow."

Glen

"The learning traveled from my head to my heart."

"When I joined, I was about to exit therapy and wanted a place to continue my growth. The collective support and insight have been invaluable. Topics like attachment styles, secure relationships, trauma, family systems, boundaries, and knowing my values used to be difficult to understand. The brainstorming with others, articles and videos provided by Alan, made this language travel from my head to my heart. What a gift to have friends to make the journey with."

Shannon

What are members saying?

"I am more compassionate towards myself."

"I have learned about attachment trauma and codependency in ways that have been so profound to my life. It has released a lot of shame and I have a much more compassionate relationship with myself. I love being in Community with other members; they all bring so much insight and wisdom from their journey as well as empathy and compassion."

Ashley

"It's truly a personalized healing program."

"The Community is a safe space to explore and learn about attachment trauma and attachment styles. The Self-Directed framework allowed me to create a truly personalized program at my own pace and on my own schedule. In addition to Alan’s guidance and instruction, there is a community of insightful, inspiring, and kind people to help me focus, heal and grow."

Glen

"The learning traveled from my head to my heart."

"When I joined, I was about to exit therapy and wanted a place to continue my growth. The collective support and insight have been invaluable. Topics like attachment styles, secure relationships, trauma, family systems, boundaries, and knowing my values used to be difficult to understand. The brainstorming with others, articles and videos provided by Alan, made this language travel from my head to my heart. What a gift to have friends to make the journey with."

Shannon

What are members saying?

"I have a more compassionate relationship with myself."

"I have learned about attachment trauma and codependency in ways that have been so profound to my life. It has released a lot of shame and I have a much more compassionate relationship with myself.

 

I love being in Community with other members; they all bring so much insight and wisdom from their journey as well as empathy and compassion."

Ashley

"Self-Directed Healing creates a truly personalized program."

"The Community is a safe space to explore and learn about attachment trauma and attachment styles. The Self-Directed framework allowed me to create a truly personalized program at my own pace and on my own schedule.

 

In addition to Alan’s guidance and instruction, there is a community of insightful, inspiring, and kind people to help me focus, heal and grow."

Glen

"The learning traveled from my head to my heart."

"When I joined, I was about to exit therapy and wanted a place to continue my growth. The collective support and insight have been invaluable. Topics like attachment styles, secure relationships, trauma, family systems, boundaries, and knowing my values used to be difficult to understand. The brainstorming with others, articles and videos provided by Alan, made this language travel from my head to my heart. What a gift to have friends to make the journey with."

Shannon

CONNECTION

The power of community connection helps us normalize relationship struggles. It inspires us to take action for change. We learn from each other. Let's engage our self-directed healing work together.

DIRECTION

The community offers a structured, reoccurring 8-week program alongside 24/7 community support from like-minded learners. Let's make a plan and dialogue about what we learn.

BELONGING

Our members are kind, supportive, and friendly. We nurture a welcoming online experience. We frequently understand each other's challenges, which means you're not alone. We're in this together.

CONNECTION

The power of community connection helps us normalize relationship struggles. It inspires us to take action for change. We learn from each other. Let's engage our self-directed healing work together.

DIRECTION

The community offers a structured, reoccurring 8-week program alongside 24/7 community support from like-minded learners. Let's make a plan and dialogue about what we learn.

BELONGING

Our members are kind, supportive, and friendly. We nurture a welcoming online experience. We frequently understand each other's challenges, which means you're not alone. We're in this together.

Start Today! Membership Pricing.


Choose either the monthly plan or the annual plan

 

Membership is currently $49/mo. This is a promotional rate and locks in the rate when you join now. The regular membership rate is $99/mo or $1188 per year.

 

With the annual payment option there is additional savings. Sign up for the Annual Savings Rate for $397 as a one-time payment which is 33% off!

 

The one-time payment is not recurring. You can cancel the monthly membership at any time. No refunds, partial refunds, or pro-rated amounts are offered when canceling.

 

Credit card or PayPal accepted.

IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

Membership Community

$49

per month

Learning together.

Supporting each other.

IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

Membership Community

$397

one time

Get Over 33% Off

Get Access For One Year

Start Today! Membership Pricing.


Choose either the monthly plan or the annual plan

 

Membership is currently $49/mo. This is a promotional rate and locks in the rate when you join now. The regular membership rate is $99/mo or $1188 per year.

 

With the annual payment option there is additional savings. Sign up for the Annual Savings Rate for $397 as a one-time payment which is 33% off!

 

The one-time payment is not recurring. You can cancel the monthly membership at any time. No refunds, partial refunds, or pro-rated amounts are offered when canceling.

 

Credit card or PayPal accepted.

IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

Membership Community

$49

per month

Learning together.

Supporting each other.

IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

One Year Access

$397

one time

Get over 33% off!

Get access for one year.

What are members saying?

"... sense of belonging"

"This community has helped me chart a new course in life. I feel a sense of belonging that is deeply gratifying. A huge thank you to Alan and other members for being genuinely supportive, caring, and understanding."

"... best decision"

"... highly recommend"

"I've been a member since the community began. I highly recommend it. It provides structure, yet is also completely flexible. I've learned so much. I encourage anyone interested in new skills to join us."

"... internal growth"

"... healthy awareness"

"This is one of the best communities on the web. I get a lot of great advice, straightforward, no-nonsense conversation, pinpointing change and healthy awareness. We help each other heal. Thank you."

"... so much wisdom"

"I've learned so much about myself. It’s great to be surrounded by people who understand what you’re going through. One of the best decisions ever made on my journey of repairing myself and learning to manage emotions."

"I have been propelled into some new territory since joining the community. There has been lots of internal growth, some tangible changes in my life as well. So I'm strapping on my seat belt and enjoying this process."​

"I love that there is so much knowledge and wisdom in this community! Knowing that whatever I’m going through, someone here has been through it or that there’s information on it too is astounding! I am so grateful."​

What are members saying?

"This community has helped me chart a new course in life. I feel a sense of belonging that is deeply gratifying. A huge thank you to Alan and other members for being genuinely supportive, caring, and understanding."

"I've been a member since the community began. I highly recommend it. It provides structure, yet is also completely flexible. I've learned so much. I encourage anyone interested in new skills to join us."

"This is one of the best communities on the web. I get a lot of great advice, straightforward, no-nonsense conversation, pinpointing change and healthy awareness. We help each other heal. Thank you."

"I love that there is so much knowledge and wisdom in this community! Knowing that whatever I’m going through, someone here has been through it or that there’s information on it too is astounding! I am so grateful."​

Emotional Connections Matter

Hello Fellow Improver: I'm glad you're interested in our community - that's wonderful. Let me explain what we're all about so you will join us.

 

If you want to improve your relationships, then you're not alone; many of us do. Many of us are learning the necessary skills to get there. In fact, we've come together as a community of like-minded learners who value an approach of self-directed healing and sharing resources.

 

We want to talk to others just like you about healing attachment trauma, not picking emotionally unavailable partners, ending codependency, practicing better boundaries, grieving our losses, cultivating self-love, and changing unhealthy family patterns. 

 

This means, we’re making changes and doing things differently. We're exploring how to strengthen secure attachment in our relationships. Do you want to join us? Are you ready to belong to a great group of people who value talking about relationships and seeing each other grow?

 

Improve Your Relationships is both a membership community and an 8-week interactive program, offering weekly discussion topics, suggested activities, and specific learning resources.

 

The community is about creating conversations with others, encouraging personal empowerment, and offering strengths-based affirmations. We are a supportive learning community - not therapy or group therapy, and not a substitute for therapy.

 

The success of our community is dependent on members who participate and engage in meaningful conversations. The community thrives when there is consistent interaction. We are seeking new members who frequently comment and actively respond to others. We welcome new members who want to get involved and share their experience.

 

Best regards,

Alan Robarge

Attachment-Focused Psychotherapist and Relationship Educator

Emotional Connections Matter

Hello Fellow Improver: I'm glad you're interested in our community - that's wonderful. Let me explain what we're all about so you will join us.

 

If you want to improve your relationships, then you're not alone; many of us do. Many of us are learning the necessary skills to get there. In fact, we've come together as a community of like-minded learners who value an approach of self-directed healing and sharing resources.

 

We want to talk to others just like you about healing attachment trauma, not picking emotionally unavailable partners, ending codependency, practicing better boundaries, grieving our losses, cultivating self-love, and changing unhealthy family patterns. 

 

This means, we’re making changes and doing things differently. We're exploring how to strengthen secure attachment in our relationships. Do you want to join us? Are you ready to belong to a great group of people who value talking about relationships and seeing each other grow?

 

Improve Your Relationships is both a membership community and an 8-week interactive program, offering weekly discussion topics, suggested activities, and specific learning resources.

 

The community is about creating conversations with others, encouraging personal empowerment, and offering strengths-based affirmations. We are a supportive learning community - not therapy or group therapy, and not a substitute for therapy.

 

The success of our community is dependent on members who participate and engage in meaningful conversations. The community thrives when there is consistent interaction. We are seeking new members who frequently comment and actively respond to others. We welcome new members who want to get involved and share their experience.

 

Best regards,

Alan Robarge

Attachment-Focused Psychotherapist and Relationship Educator

Frequently Asked Questions

Who is this community for ?

People who are interested in building relationship skills and who also want to understand attachment behaviors are a good fit for our community. Those who enjoy participating in the weekly homework assignments find they gain the most benefit from their membership.

 

CLICK HERE TO REGISTER

What is the total time commitment ?

Is this a therapy group ?

Who are the members ?

Can I only join at Week One ?

How do I cancel my membership ?

You're Invited!

Join other like-minded learners who value improving relationships. We are a group of kind, supportive folks who all want better relating. Does this sound like you? We'd love to have you join us. Let's talk about relationships.

You're Invited!

Join other like-minded learners who value improving relationships. We are a group of kind, supportive folks who all want better relating. Does this sound like you? We'd love to have you join us. Let's talk about relationships.


IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

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